B"H

Dear Friends,

Last weekend was the International Conference of Chabad Rabbi's ,called Shluchim, held annually at Lubavitch World Headquarters in Brooklyn NY. From the four corners of the earth they came together from Asia, Europe, Africa, North and South America, and even Australia. Sorry, no Antartica, but from the other six continents they were all here for Shabbos.

And they stayed at our families house in Stamford CT.

An uncle from Moscow, cousin from Finland, Sister inlaw from Cape Town, Aunt from Brazil, cousin from Sydney, and many more from across the country were a part of 40 close relatives that came to spend Shabbos together with our family after arguably the hardest day, and before definitely the hardest week - of our entire lives.

I don't think the words exist that accurately describe the feeling of sitting Shiva for a third sibling, a brother (in law) several years older than us and who by divine providence shared his  exact birth date with Chanie .

But if there was any comfort to be found it was in the outpouring of love and support that came to us from every part of our lives. The torrent of thoughtful emails and calls from our friends at Tufts including parents and alumni, and from our extended immediate family who have literally carried us with with a love and care that makes us wonder whether they are perhaps partially angelic, and of course the hundreds of friends who have passed through our doors in the last seven days bringing us a deeper feeling for our dear brother (in law) Mendel.

As much as we appreciated what a special person he was, we never imagined how many lives our precious Mendel touched. With time, we will make sure to put together more of Mendel's story but for now I'll just share one story. This story was told by the wife of a very dear friend of Mendel, minutes after sitting down for Shiva to mourn his passing.

"My husband Albert was working at the World Trade Center on 9/11 and saw things that day that no human being should ever see. From that day he became withdrawn, avoiding work, family responsibilities and anything that resembled his normal life. Anything and everything we tried to help him come out of it, just didn't work.

One day Mendel showed up at the house. "Come Albert, we're going out." I don't know where they went, what they did or what they spoke about. I never asked. All I know is that three hours later they came back to the house and Albert was a changed man. He was again the positive productive Albert that I always knew.  and Mendel gave me my husband back."

Your love, support, concern and most importantly special Mitzvot, meant so much to Mendel and all of us.  This week in Medford, candle lighting is at 4:08 pm. The Shabbat candles always have and continue to bring light into a world that has become too dark. As so many of you have done already, please share with us any additional Mitzvot that you have undertaken in his memory. As in the past, these will be shared with the entire family and these Mitzvot will bring pride and peace to his Neshomo and comfort to our broken hearts.

May we always be able to share only happy and joyous news and may the Neshomo of Menachem Mendel Ben Yibdlcht"a Horav Yisrael Hakohen Shlit"a be a source of eternal inspiration  and a "gutteh better" a heavenly advocate for a speedy recovery for Levi Yitzchok Ben Tzirl and Chaya Mushka Bas Gila Elka - together with all those in need of blessing - and most importantly for the speedy redemption when "they will arise and sing" and we will be reunited with Mendel, in the coming of Moshiach in a world perfected and redeemed.

With you in spirit,

Rabbi Tzvi and Chanie Backman

P.S. With the conclusion of the first week of mourning we will be staying with the family in Stamford CT for one more Shabbat to support each other at this particularly difficult period in our lives. Shabbat at the Tufts Chabad House will resume, G-d willing, next week. Shabbat Shalom.

To read more about the Jewish perspective on death and mourning, click here.